Hi Kids!  I'm Spotty, the official mascot of the Department of Homeland Security.  I have a very important role to play in the U.S. government.  You see, kids, when the President of the United States needs a boost in the public opinion polls, one of the things he does is to call his good friend, Tom Ridge, so we can all play a fun game called "Connect the Dots on the Wagging Dog".

I'm just a spotty puppy but, it's a great game and the grown-ups in the administration have been playing it for some time now.  Just about everyone is playing Wag the Dog!  Did you spot me romping around the White House rose garden on Monday with Donald Rumsfeld, Colin Powell, Tom Mueller, John McLaughlin, John Ashcroft, and Tom Ridge when George Bush said he is going to endorse the creation of another multi-billion dollar budgeted government office?

You may not have seen me or Condoleeza Rice in the NY Times story photo, because just like some foreign leaders in the world, Dick Cheney doesn't think I'm house-broken enough.  So, Condi took me for a walk to do our business together out of the public eye.  Like my boss, DHS Secretary Tom Ridge, the new Terrorism Czar will help you feel safe from the scary bad men that the only President Bush can find and stop with his super hero powers.

Colin Powell just recently played Wag the Dog with me all the way over in Pakistan.  You see, the Pakistani Intelligence services helped a really smart nuclear scientist named A.Q. Khan sell all kinds of WMD technology to countries that our president Bush calls the Axis of Evil.  Since president Bush wants to win the election and be able to play Wag the Dog with me again next year, his Secretary of State Colin Powell can't complain too loudly about the Pakistani leader Pervez Mussharav releasing and pardoning the smart Mr. A.Q. Khan when Bush needs Pakistan to capture a High Value Target of Al Qaeda.  Don't feel bad if you find it a little confusing to connect all my spotty dots -- I'm a just a puppy -- but I like to move fast, don't I?  Even the really smart grown-ups in the Central Intelligence Agency have troubles keeping up sometimes, too.  I see where they just updated their CIA World Fact Book information on Pakistan in May to play this game properly.

The Pakistani government wanted to play Wag the Dog with the Bush Administration because they feel a Democrat in the White House would favor the government of their Kashmir rival India.  They're probably right about that.  Remember when the Clintons went to India and rode around on top of all those big elephants and then Bill and Hillary threw a fun party in pretty white tents for the Indian delegation at the White House that one year?  I bet that was fun.  You can never eat enough curry, I guess.

Because of the Indian Kashmir situation and A.Q. Khan, the Pakistanis need to play Wag the Dog with the president.  Military Generals in Pakistani Inter-Services Intelligence have told reporters of The New Republic that after September 11th, 2001 no time-tables were discussed by the Bush Administration in 2002 and 2003 but, now "have been told at every level that apprehension or killing of HVTs before [the] election is [an] absolute must."

One Pakistani General visiting Washington recently was worried about playing Wag the Dog and said, "If we don't find these guys by the election, they are going to stick this whole nuclear mess up our asshole."  Don't get upset Mr. Pakistani General, your coup in Pakistan is safe with president Bush.  With the capture of an HVT announced during John Kerry's speech at the Democratic National Convention, President Bush is so happy to see his political opponent become one of the few candidates in over 30 years not to get a bump in public opinion polls after their own convention.

In fact, George Bush was so happy -- Colin Powell now calls the whole affair of illicit international nuclear proliferation by A.Q. Khan an internal Pakistani situation and not of concern to the United States.  See how easy it is to play Wag the Dog?  With all those WMDs everywhere in the world, except Iraq apparently, it's a good thing Tom Ridge made sure we're all going to be ready.

George Bush always uses one of the best super hero powers he has to find and protect us from the bad men and keep his job -- your tax money.  Even with all the reasons the Pakistani goverment and its ISI already have for helping Bush try to keep his job, George is throwing cold hard cash at Pakistan.  He is pushing hard on the U.S. Congress to allocate another $3 billion dollars to Pakistan over the next five years.  Why, just before the Democratic National Convention, around July 17th, the Bush Administration wrote off almost $500 million of Pakistani debt.

Well, I have to go do my business out of the public eye again.  I sure hope that whoever the new Terrorism Czar will be -- he will want to play Wag the Dog with me  -- like the rest of president Bush's grown-up friends do.  Hurry up, Condi !!  I have to pee, right now !!

So ... why?  Well, I go through the TAG board periodically (or when asked) and delete entries.  Mainly I delete your entries because it reloads the page periodically or when you add a new entry for chatting and when it gets too large, it takes up bandwidth loading constantly.  My general rule was this: if you put an annoying little smilie emoticon on the TAG, that entry was the first to go when I cleaned house.

The second rule: if the entry was older.  But the second rule bummed me out because I hate to throw away memories, so, some entries were deemed to be classics and had to be preserved (like Hygelic reading my blog in the bathroom on his cell phone).

Then the first and second rules unfortunately clashed when it came to old school phreeks who might put an ascii emoticon at the end of their sentence, like Skennedy (et al).  These people were violating my first unstated rule through no fault of their own, and, because the programmers of the TAG board must have thought to themselves, "how handy-fucking-dandy would it be if we just translated every ascii emoticon to a different happy little yellow face?"  So, they dropped another few hits of Exstacy, patted each other on the back and went back to coding the TAG board.

So, whether it is a good thing or a bad thing, whether it is wise or terribly, terribly wrong -- I've decided to archive the TAG board here for all to see -- and still be able to delete older entries (and keep the TAG.html small) with a clear conscience.

Read Archive [ Prior to July 2004 ]


Hallie » haha i like the thunderstorms voter registration
Winston » ooh, nice backdrop Yours is quite different, I like the red round the tagboard...
J f Z » Are you threatening me?! Hehehe. You said, "BUNGhole" ... Hehehe.
Brandon Starr » "I am the Great Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!" Those were always the funniest B&B episodes, when Beavis goes on a caffeine/sugar high and becomes his alter-ego Cornholio.
Hallie » lol that's not good; on school nights i get like, 6 hrs of sleep, sometimes when i can get to bed early, then 7 hrs. i always sleep in class
J f Z » ROFL ... yeah, I do both ... then throw down a few quarts of coffee. Turns me into a serious Beavis.
Brandon Starr » Jitters from not eating can be fun, too.
J f Z » Hallie, I don't drink or do drugs anymore so all I have left for fun is that semi-conscious state of zombieness that come from sleep deprivation ... blink-blink
Marvelous Bob » Last month, Michael Bounoauro uploaded to his unknownhero.com website the final chapter of his "Marvelous Bob" story, seemed to make right with himself and those around him, and then ended his life.
Hallie » you don't sleep a lot. dont you feel tired, or you're used to it and living off on coffee.
John Furie Zacharias » I sleep for 8 hours for the 1st time in weeks and Brandon is partying on my TAGbd with no less than 5 girls. Hehe. emobabe, mysterygirl, and legs: Maybe Duke is right, there is a God <ker-wink>
emobabe05 » very nice..I like!
legs » Oh, hey, cool site. I love the lightening bolts and the just say no t-shirt. Ha.
Hallie » lol helleena says you don't understand girls at all; is that somewhat true? it's ok i dont get guys sometimes
Hallie » oh i found a mistake; i left out the word people. it didnt make sense
Brandon Starr » Just found and blogged about a story about a Bush speech blunder.
Helleena » Boy Hallie did you open up a can of worms. You will know what I am talking about
Hallie » lol, why do ask and say, "you're from texas? you must love bush". not that anyone's ever asked me that, but i am from texas
Hallie » ohh ok just wondering. oh and thanks for the advice! that does sound fun, traveling and helping at the same time, + get paid! i'll consider it !
mystery girl? » very very kick ass blog
Helleena » I know that I have been there and jzf has a link to it look under phreeks and clik on blogs.
Hallie » i think it's brandonstarr.blogdrive
Hallie » jfz, do you know the blog brando starr? i've been there once and his blog is almost like yours; all about politics.
Hallie » aww more polar bear pictures. poor boris
J f Z » *sigh* if I could just get Dennis to put this URL in with his comments instead of blogdrive: http://pssst-in-sandbox.deviantart.com/ more PPL would read Sandbox
J f Z » I'd build you one for a pack of cigarettes tonight
Duke » That rig is SWEET!!! Where can I get one? huh? huh? heh
Thunderstorms' PC » You'll be GREEN with envy ...
J f Z » I always use [Permalink] to read the entry and make comments. I hate the javascripted comments window at blogdrive.
Helleena » It is at the bottem of every entry Dennis. It says Make Some Thunder.
Dennis » Where does one find a "comments" section on this page. I looked, but....
Hallie » if you want to will you check out her blog at http://philonysh.blogdrive.com/ and tell her what you think !
Hallie » hi jfz!! i have a friend at blogdrive and she wrote an entry about politics (everybody seems to be doing that NOW) and she would like opinions or maybe arguments.
Helleena » I always wanted to have a neighbor just like you.
Hallie » lol i think that's really cute what melicious said!
J f Z » Heh. Just as soon as I can tie the laces on these sneakers and put on my sweater in the closet over there ...
Melicious » It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood... won't you be my neighbor??????
J f Z » BTW, it might be more helpful for us to have these conversations in the comments section of any given entry as stuff on this TAG board scrolls out of view so quickly and is easily missed.
J f Z » No, Dennis, you're spot on. I just left out the name Hussein so as not to be automatically googled that way, and then be inundated by chicken-hawk comments.
Hallie » hi! just dropping by to see how you're doing!
Dennis » Oh the wonders of the universe - Is a baby buzzard "ugly"? Does its mother think so?
Dennis » I was sure you were talking about Bush - pathetic, meglomania, paranoid...perhaps my attitude needs a "fix", eh?
Duke » deepest apologies oh great and powerful Hypno Toad...forgive my puny self for calling you a frog...later...frog
Hypno Toad » I continue to command my minions from my permalink for those wise enough to know it and give all glory to me. Don't ever call me a frog again, you foolish puny human!!
Duke » alright...in your sleep deprived world of 36 hour days did you accidentally step on the frog?
Hallie » LOL!
J f Z » No, not really sleep deprived. I can't remember the last time I saw any interesting porn, either. (sigh) GOD is just being a typically presumptious and judgemental POS.
Hallie » lol!! exactly how MANY hours do you sleep??? are you sleep deprived? haha
J f Z » FYI: I sleep like everyone else -- it's just that MY planet has a 36 hour day. Also, on my planet of 'horny, atheistic insomniacs', GOD is brave enough to have web address when he talks to us.
GOD » I suggest that you stop looking at porn, get some sleep, and get a job. This will do wonders on your life my son.
Helleena » Now you duke you and I both know that if and when he does sleep it is only for a an hour or 2. I should know I live with him.
Hallie » LOL really?! i sleep at weird times of the day, but i have a time limit
Duke » he sleeps at all hours of the day... different ones each day is all...*jab*
just a stranger » I don't think that he ever sleeps.
Hallie » and you were up late last night! btw, how are you doing today?
Hallie » lol thanks for all the tips about my 2nd blog! i will try that when i get home today
J f Z » Dennis, when you get a minute - use the 'contact me' or the link at the top and email me. I'd like to give you that Sandbox info, remember?
J f Z » It's like a Jedi Mind Trick - "Nothing to see here ... move along"
J f Z » Hey there D-man ... Man, I just posted that! You're quick. I usually see how it actually looks and reads, and then edit it 2 or 3 more times. Heh.
Dennis » Course in Miracles says, "Aggressors can't see clearly" - hence, "invisibility" sometimes called "stealth".
J f Z » I'll be right over ...
Hallie » really? my second blog isn't readable cause of the white text? i thought it would be fine against the yellow and black background
Hallie » hey, GOD stopped by your page. you're blessed!
J f Z » It might be simpler to just put a link to 168.html, if you don't mind the comments under the entry.
Duke » Hey thanks...you've found some sweet sites I hadn't run across yet...definitely adding some to my bookmarks...
Dennis » The drumroll is back!! I'm waiting for the frog to pop out of the stratosphere - with Hal
Dennis » Yes! about God's Loving everybody. I think that is why I can be so bold as to be hatefully human at times.
Hallie » hi jfz! just dropping by again to say hello!
J f Z » Thanks for stopping by GOD ... now how about a hot tip on a winning lottery ticket?
GOD » I like everybody. I wake and say " Hey everyone I LOVE YOU!"
CLICK ME » if you 'like to watch'
J f Z » Heh. You can say *that* again! I sometimes forget if I only hate everyone or actually everybody.
Dennis » Oppps!! again.
Dennis » Revision? "I hate MOST everybody and everything. I hate MOST everything about everybody." But, I may be wrong, eh?
Dennis » Revision? "I hate MOST everybody and everything. I hate MOST everything about everybody." But, I may be wrong, eh?
J f Z » Yeah, I'm a rock lobster with burning eyes. Feels like I have a fever. But, I'm going to the pool again tomorrow in between thunderstorms.
Hallie » sun burned huh? that's horrible.. i didnt really get sunburned and not exactly a nice tan either. just a slight slight teeny weeny tan
Hallie » LOL! every time i come here, the toad just gets me! haha
J f Z » Heh... I know how you feel, Hallie. After posting 2 thoughtful entries this past week, I'm just screwing around on Web-Litter lately.
Sandbox » Read Dennis' FREE online book. Take charge of your life! <--Click on 'Sandbox'.
Hallie » i think i've been here like, 3 times already so is it ok if i link you to my blog? i'm gonna go ahead and do that before i forget and lose your url, so if you mind just let me know
Hallie » hi jfz, how are you today? it's summer and i'm so lazy i have things to do but i dont want to do them. anybody here feels the same?
Dennis » Waiting for Zarathuthra! Went to deviantart link. I'm not there. I'm lost - help!!!!
J f Z » I was going to suggest trying PHPnuke w/phpBB since it is cool, free, and supported by a large online community of users and tinker-ers. But it looks like WordPress has got good karma too.
J f Z » I'll stop by again ... since it's PHP, I had an idea to share.
Myisha » Because i don't know much about php..(the blog is written in it)
Myisha » often..I finally decided what journal system I want to use...(wordpress)I want to use it to powed my who site..So that's gonna take some time..
Myisha » Thanks for coming by my website..I'm still tweaking my site so that I could have it look like I wanted it...I'm getting there slowing by surely...That's why i haven't been around to blogdrive that
Toulon » HEY! Just wanted to say Hello! Laters
Hallie » and yes, my blog is very pink
Hallie » hiiii! lol thanks for tagging my board. great answer about the parkway and driveaway !
J f Z » Hey Dennis ... did you click on your name in that blog entry?
Dennis » e-coli is one of the coliforms - the same period I got deathly sick. Living is bad for your health.
Dennis » I got a copy of the bacteria tests for that period. It showed the high coliform for two weeks and we weren't notified
J f Z » howdy c-dude! How's the SPOT treating ya?
citizendude » Hey JFZ, how's everything ? Just dropping by to say hello to my old Blogdrive mates ....
J f Z » Heh. I hear the local schools are pretty good. It's nauseatingly rural in places though. But that's just me ... remember, I'm equinaphobic. Mel might be renting her condo in Ft Meyers.
Brandon Starr » I hear Jeb's house is nice.
Kristi » Does anyone know of a good place in Florida to raise kids? I think the winters here are too bad and I need a move. lol
Dennis » Jeff - remember I've been a "psychic/medium" - "sensitive" for 30+ years. Not much chance to use it - people are closed off more and more
J f Z » Wow ... Dennis, too. (three). FYI: Clicking on my name at the top or 'contact me' at the bottom will send an email to me. (It's so weird. I think about Dennis, and he appears on my TAG everytime.)
J f Z » Howdy Xavier! My Web-Litter guy returns!
Dennis » sorry for multiples - trouble in Imagica transmission. Can you erase Jeff? Please do. Can't find you at Plastics.
Dennis » news this morning: Bush camp is considering postponing the elections in Nov. because of "terrorist threats". Is that enough? Good to have you back. Hey Jeff, good to have you back
Skennedy » Good Morning, Jeff Just thought I'd say it's a beautiful day up here in MI, your forsaken land.
Helleena » Yea you have to read the entries not just the Pics.
J f Z » Hi tazz! Which Bush bash?
tazz » waz up j f z with the Bush bash I dont get it .
Brandon Starr » I love your "the pig says..." shirts. Have you thought of doing "the Bush says..."?
J f Z » Got it, Sare. And that's really cool Brandon. I like your Bush Brain one. I'm tempted to put some of my little political collage grafix on zazzle ... maybe make a section for it.
sare » thanx 4 ur tag, Furie! i just love relishing in some quality deprecation! also, plz be aware that my location's changed (click on name)
Brandon Starr » Well, you're welcome. And I'm pleased to say I've now sold several shirts--including the "lying/dying" shirt I just put up today!
J f Z » Thanks, Brandon. You inspired me.
Brandon Starr » Congrats on your Zazzle page, JfZ!
~Ams » It's true you know... God does kill a kitten everytime you masterbate, a kitten and a grandmother. LOL! I love your blog you friggin' genius you!
J f Z » Thanks, Sare.
sare » hey, there. Likin' the saddam pic.
John Furie Zacharias » Started on the YCMTSU shirts today ...
Brandon Starr » Hey, JfZ, I just did a blog about an article: Portrait of Jesus brings artist fame. I think you'll like it...